baltimore

last weekend, i visited friends in baltimore. it was a really nice getaway from new york, more so than boston. i like boston, but there's something about baltimore that i really admire. maybe it's still a relatively blue-collar, middle-class city. my new favorite museum is the american visionary art museum. i even flirted with the idea of moving to baltimore to justify purchasing a membership.

their main exhibit was "all faiths beautiful." along the staircases between each floor, postcards from frank warren's postsecrets were framed and posted on the walls. these postcards specifically involved people's secrets about faith. some of them were pretty general (i found god, now i'm saved. i lost my faith and am hiding it from my family and friends.); some were pretty profound. there was one memorable card regarding a military personnel (navy?) who is a liberal atheist who felt compelled to lie about his political and religious stance to gain respect among his peers and to appear as a candidate for promotions among his superiors.

there was a room devoted to the female as the origin of life that permeates in many religious beliefs as well. i admit that i've gotten to a point in my life where i don't feel the angst i once did in my younger years towards the societal oppression of women. i think it was just a matter of realizing being angry doesn't change anything. really, i need to work hard to prove my capabilities, even if it means i have to work extra hard to do so. some things in life aren't fair, but it must go on. so it was actually refreshing to see artwork that promoted feminism so vocally.

i also really liked and appreciated an exhibit that focused on artworks created by people with mental disabilities. art, being a medium with so little constraint and so open to new ideas and ways of communication, offered a voice to some of these people who aren't able to express themselves in conventional ways. also, it's a way for them to create something beautiful that other people can admire, giving them a sense of gratification that they might not feel often in their lives.

within all the exhibits, the museum promoted a sense of community among baltimore artists by selecting many of the artworks from local artists. baltimore, being sort of the underdog among east coast cities, is trying to rebuild itself to come out of that status, and art is an important element to any community trying to elevate itself, allowing expressions of progression and vision. besides the obvious attraction of my dear friends and their loving cats, i hope to visit baltimore again very soon.

juveniles

i just read this article today on nytimes.com and am once again astounded to learn exactly how cruel the u.s. justice system. i can't believe that we have a president who claims "compassion" endlessly for everything he does, and yet, we are the only country in the u.n. who voted to uphold life imprisonment without the possibility of parole for juveniles. what kind of compassion doesn't give KIDS a second chance?

for a child to commit a heinous crime, there must've been some sort of psychological damage to him/her to begin with. doesn't that justify a chance for redemption? what about rehabilitation and therapy instead of locking them up behind cement walls? what good does that do? it's like tossing out a pair of socks that got messed up in the wash. but these are kids. if they have the proper care and education, i'm sure most of them would grow up to be fine, law-abiding adults. it's a sad world we live in that the most powerful country in the world would deny children who've made mistakes a second chance. isn't making mistakes a part of learning, part of growing up?

boston

i'm visiting high school friends in boston for a few days. one of them lives in pittsburg and is in boston for the weekend, and i haven't seen her in years. it's odd to be able to say that, to think of spans of time in years, that i've lived long enough to think of time in greater increments than just seasons, a sign that i'm definitely growing older. the other two friends, a married couple about to expect their first child, live in boston, and i had visited them not too long ago.

the two girls lived on my hall during my senior year of high school. the one i've kept in frequent touch with has changed quite a bit since her high school days of jeans and sweatshirts; she's now an attorney at a major law firm in boston. she dresses the part of a grown up. she's still old self in many ways, however. the friend who's visiting from pittsburg hasn't changed much. different hair style but pretty much everything about her is the same: demeanor, attire, way she carries herself. i'm sure there are other changes that i've missed or didn't get to see since we did only spend a mere 48 hours together. i guess it's odd how people remain the same and change over the course of time. some things stay the same, other things evolve. it's also interesting to see how life has taken us on very different paths since our point of juncture in high school, both in our professional and personal lives. i guess seeing how friends evolve is a part of growing up and a part of friendships.

catharsis

i started on a nightmare project about 6 weeks ago and was recently dismissed from it. i believe it was a wrongful termination, an opinion being supported by many of my former co-workers, and have informed my union regarding this matter. i just want to work with people i can learn from again, like the people i worked with in los angeles. i'm tired of learning from counter-examples. i can't believe that my bosses are getting worse and worse, in terms of competency and decency. after my last boss, i didn't think anyone could be worse. i was wrong.

i thought it would be awkward to go into the office this past monday to clean out my desk. but it actually felt cathartic, to toss out all my paperwork and packing up MY belongings. going around to say bye to people i liked on the show was sad but also nice - to feel sad confirmed that real friendships had formed, which is always a wonderful thing. everyone was so supportive of me, undoubtedly believing that i shouldn't have been fired. some even expressed jealousy that i was getting to leave this hellish project. i mustered the courage to say bye even to my boss who fired me. i kept it short but courteous, "i'm taking off. good luck with the rest of the show." that person briskly replied, "all right, bye." she didn't even look up from her computer to make eye contact. at that point, i knew it was their loss to have me go, not mine.

it's nice to be back in new york though. my first day back, being on the subway slightly felt like home, like i'm returning to reality. and the best things about that project, the people who kept me going, they are still in my life. what's ironic is that a disaster occurred on the project just this morning. there is bad karma that surrounds this thing, and i'm relieved to no longer be a part of it. had i been dismissed because i was solely at fault, i would accept it and let it go. since that was not the case, i'm sitting back and watching it fall apart, while wagging a finger at them to say, what goes around, comes around. thank goodness for unions.