sadness

today, while waiting for my flight at the denver airport, i came across the obituary for nicholas hughes in the new york times. he had hung himself. i was surprised to find myself on the verge of tears reading about his life. having grown up surrounded by so much tragedy (his mother, sylvia plath, the famous poet committed suicide, and his stepmother committed murder suicide with his stepsister), it made me wonder if he had ever lived a moment of his life without pain. maybe that was why he was attracted to fishery, having been a fisheries biologist in alaska. creatures so simple and beautiful, not having to endure sadness, an instinctive bond to travel and stay with others in schools, it's poetic to have chosen that field of work and life, a life of being in and near water, the tranquility of nature. he left behind his sister, frieda. i hope she has found or will continue to find something to live for and hold onto it.